Sunlight filtered through the closed blinds, startling her. For a brief moment, she couldn't remember where she was or what had happened.
There was a movement next to her and she turned her head. Eiro was standing near the foot of the bed, his back to her, revealing the deep scars that would forever be embedded there. He pulled a t-shirt over his head, covering them from sight as he always did.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
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1 – 200 of 205 Newer› Newest»She put her hands to her face, rubbing her eyes. What a vivid dream. "Ugh..."
Eiro turned his head to face her, smiling. "Hey. I didn't mean to wake you."
"You're fine. Weird dreams woke me up." She smiles tiredly at him.
He went over to her and leaned down, kissing her. "What kind of dreams?"
"About killing Narikage...among other things from when I was fourteen."
He leans down and gives her a gentle hug.
She returns it. "It was...so vivid.."
"Do you want to talk about it?"
She shrugs. "Not much to talk about..."
"Still."
She sighs softly. "I remember... Meeting him, and you. And when we found out about him being an angel. And then killing him. And I have no idea why I dreamed about it."
"Maybe...because I wanted you to."
She looks up at him, surprised. "Nani?"
"You've been avoiding what happened for years, Kira."
"I've been avoiding it? I've been happy! I love you. And our kids. And grandchildren."
"Yes, you love me. You love our children, our grandchilden...our family. But you still love Yoshiko."
She looks away. "Yes... I do..."
"And that's why you've been avoiding everything that happened when we were younger."
"It hurts you..."
"A little but I understand. He technically was the first one you met. The whole time even we were interacting, you thought it was him."
She closes her eyes and a tear runs down her cheek.
He reaches over and brushes it away. "Kira, I'm not upset with you."
"Why not? I fell in love with you initially because you were a clone of a man I loved..." Her shoulders shake a little with silent sobs.
He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling her into his arms. "I know."
She cries harder.
He let her cry, knowing it would help her in the long run.
She turned into him and sobbed against his shoulder.
He ran his fingers through her long, soft hair, just rocking her slightly.
"I-I'm s-sorry..."
"You don't have to be sorry, Kira. I understand."
She sniffles a little and wipes her eyes. She looks up at him.
He rests his forehead against her own, the look in his eyes so gentle and full of love that it almost makes her want to cry again. "I've always known that a part of you still loves Yoshiko, Kira, and I know that you first fell in love with me because I am a part of him. But it doesn't bother me."
She kisses him softly. "I'm so lucky to have you..."
"And you always will. I'm never going to leave you again."
She hugs him. "Why bring all this up, though? I mean, if it doesn't matter..."
He smiled a little. "Kira...today is the day he died."
She blinks. "Oh."
"And its the day that you need to let him go."
She looks away. "I don't know how..."
"You need to accept what happened and let him rest. We can't change the past, Kira."
"I killed him! I'm just supposed to let that go?"
"No, Kira. You didn't kill him. I did."
"What?" She stares at him like he just punched her in the stomach.
"The day before the battle...I was the one who killed him. I killed him and I took his soul."
She gasps a little, like she's having a hard time breathing. "Wh-what?"
"I had to, Kira. He was suffering. Every moment he was alive, was so painful for him...the angel DNA was slowly taking over his own and if left to completely envelope him, he would have destroyed everything. He would have been too powerful for even me to kill."
She gasps for breath. "Then...who did I kill??"
"You killed the angel that was taking him over."
She drops her head to her hands. "Oh, God..."
He pulled her into his arms.
She sobs softly. "Why?"
"I told you why, Kira. He asked me to and I wasn't going to deny him what he wanted and needed the most."
She leaned into her husband. "I can't... I just can't..."
"You just can't what?"
"I love him too much to let him go."
"Kira, you're holding him here, don't you see that?" He cupped her face in his hands, looking into her eyes. "I know you love him but..."
She looks up at him through tear filled eyes. "But I need to let him go..."
He nodded. "You're holding yourself back too."
"What do you mean?"
"Kira, you still blame yourself for what happened that day. You don't realize how much happiness you miss by repeating that day over and over."
She looks away. "Gomen."
"You don't have to apologize, Kira. I just want you to be the happiest you can be."
"And I will do the best that I can." She kisses him softly. "I'm sorry for putting you through all this..."
"I've told you, Kira: you have nothing to apologize for."
"Still. I love you."
"I love you too." He kissed her lightly.
She returned the kiss and leaned against him. "Gomen, Narikage..."
He held her against him, stroking her long black hair, saying nothing.
She sighed softly.
"Take a shower. It'll relax you. I'll go start breakfast."
She kisses him. "Okay. I think it would be more relaxing with you..." She smiles and stands up.
"True. But you know as well as I that the moment we step in there together, we'll have children banging on our door, hungry as wolves." He smiles slightly.
She laughs ruefully. "Yeah."
"I'll make it up to you." He kisses her foreahead and heads for the door.
She smiles softly as she watches him go. She loved him, so much.
And she knew he loed her too, just as much, if not more.
She went and got in the shower, turning the water on hot, letting it stream down her body. It felt good, relieving her tension and letting her relax.
That dream kept echoing in her head, replaying itself. She had really loved Narikage...
She closed her eyes and thought of him as he had been when she was fourteen. She remembered his smile, such a rare occurance. She opened her eyes. "I love you, and I'll miss you. But you need to move on. Forgive me?" Her words were soft.
For the briefest moment, she felt something touch her cheek and in that instant, she knew that he'd never really blamed her. And never would.
She let out a soft sob, a smile still on her face. "How's that for irony? The angel of forgiveness needed to be forgiven."
She heard a gentle laugh in her ear, the laugh of someone who understood.
"Thank you. I love you."
There was a feather light touch on her cheek and a kiss to her forehead. Then the presence was gone and she knew it was forever.
She inhaled sharply as tears slid involuntarily down her cheeks.
She would never see Narikage again.
Not even in her dreams.
She fell against the wall of the shower, sobbing.
Downstairs, amidst his children screaming for pancakes, Eiro stopped, his eyes slightly unfocused.
Narikage's presence was gone.
She had finally let him go. His brother was at rest.
A part of him, the part that he never wanted his wife to see was overjoyed. That was the same part that had hated his clone, hated him for always being in his wife's mind. Narikage had known that Eiro felt something for Kira when she'd first arrived. But because of how things had worked out...she'd fallen in love with him.
And Eiro had always been resentful of that. The situation had worked against him. If things had been different in the past, he might have been able to happily be with Kira from the first. He might not have had to hurt her. Instead, he'd ended up damn near breaking her heart.
And he knew that SHE had resented HIM for that, at least a little bit. She had always wondered what it would be like to be with Narikage.
And he hated that.
But now, Narikage was gone. And maybe his wife could begin to forget him. Just a little.
He wanted to be the only one on her mind, just as she was the only one on his.
Only time would tell.
******
Lucifer sat up and stretched, yawning loudly. His touseled white hair fell into his face and he pushed it back.
Beside him, Camael stirred a little, but didn't wake.
He smiled and leaned over her, kissing her gently.
She made a soft noise, her eye lids fluttering.
He smoothed back her hair and kissed her forehead before sliding out of bed and stretching, his body long and lean in the morning light.
"Luci?" Camael's voice was soft and full of sleep. When he looked at her she blinked slowly.
He smiled back at her. "Good morning, gorgeous."
She smiled softly. "Good morning."
He leaned down and kissed her again. "Sleep well?"
"Mm. Very well." She smiled at him sweetly. "You?"
"Well, since I'm sleeping next to the woman I love every night...absolutely."
She grins. "I love you."
"I love you too." He grins back.
"Any sound from the girls?"
"No, nothing yet. But I thought I'd go down and start breakfast anyway."
She smiled and sat up. "I should probably check on the baby."
"Alright. What should I make?"
"Hmm...I'm not sure. Why don't you see if Lucy is up and ask her if she is."
"I think I will." He kissed her and pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms and a tight t-shirt.
She smiled appreciatively and got out of bed, pulling on a robe, before going to her other daughter's room.
The babe was awake and kicking her feet quietly in her crib, sucking on her fist. When she saw her mother, she grinned.
She smiled and picked the little one up. "Hello, my love... are you hungry?" She carried the baby to the rocking chair and sat down, raising the little girl to her breast.
She snuffled at her mother's breast for a moment before latching on.
She smiled and stroked Anael's cheek. "There you go, baby."
"Mommy?" Lucy entered the nursery, rubbing her eyes and yawning.
"Hi, sweetie." She smiles. "Come here and give me a kiss."
Lucy smiled and came forward, kissing her mother's cheek.
"How are you, sweetie?"
"Good. Daddy's making waffles for us. And eggs."
She smiled and stroked her oldest's hair.
She touched her sister's head, smiling at her mother and the little baby.
"What do you want to do today, lovey?"
"Um...can we go to the park?"
"I think that would be okay."
"Yay!" Lucy jumped up and down a little, her nighty bouncing with her.
Camael smiled.
"Can we get ice cream too?"
"Well, we'll see. We might have to ask Daddy about that."
"Okay. Are you coming down soon?"
"Once your sister is done eating."
"Okay. I'm going to help daddy with breakfast."
"Alright, darling. Don't get in the way too much."
"I won't!" She grinned and she heard Lucy thundering down the stairs a moment later.
Camael smiled and kept rocking as she fed her baby.
When Anael was done, she pulled away, kicking her feet.
Camael smiled and burped the infant, carrying her downstairs.
Father and daughter were in the kitchen, Lucy on a stool, mixing batter int a big bowl. Lucy was covered in flour and looked quite happy to be so.
Camael chuckled softly, still patting Anael's back.
"Hi, Mommy!" Lucy grinned at her mother. "I'm helping!"
"So I see. Daddy is letting you get all dirty, isn't he." She walks up and kisses Lucifer.
"So?" Lucifer grinned at her.
"Just commenting."
Lucifer just grinned at her.
She laughs softly and kisses him gently.
"Daddy said that I needed a bath before we could go to the park anyway," Lucy said, reaching over her father to grab an egg.
"Ahah, I'll do that part." Lucifer plucked the item from his daughter's hand.
Camael laughed. "You do tend to smash the shells, my love."
Lucy made a little face but didn't argue. "I'll set the table then."
"Alright, but wash your hands first."
"Yes, mama." Lucy jumped down and dragged her footstool over to the sink so she could wash.
"Hows the little one feeling today?" Lucifer asked, smiling at Anael.
"She's doing well. Eating like a piggy."
"That simply means she's healthy." Lucifer kissed Cam's cheek then Anael's.
"I know and I'm glad. She's doing much better than she was initially."
"I know and I'm glad. She's doing much better than she was initially."
"So is her mama."
She smiles. "You would know."
"Of course I would." He gave her one lingering kiss then turned back to making breakfast for his family.
She smiles and goes to sit down.
She smiles and goes to sit down.
"What kind of juice do you want, Mama?" Lucy asked.
"Orange juice will be fine, darling." Camael smiled at her oldest daughter.
"'Kay." Lucy pulled the carton of orange juice out of the fridge.
Anael fussed a little so Camael bounced her. When that didn't work she sighed softly. "I think someone has a poopy diaper." She stood up to go change the baby.
"I don't miss doing that with you," Lucifer said, ruffling Lucy's hair.
She scowled up at him. "Don't ruffle my hair! You'll mess it up." She stuck her tongue out at her father.
"Oh well, la-ti-da!" Lucifer teased with a grin.
She kept making faces at her father, trying not to giggle.
He made them back, smiling the whole time.
She giggled like mad. "Daddy, your silly!"
"No sillier than my little girl." He kissed the top of her head.
She giggled softly and skipped off to do her next task.
Lucifer laughed and kept going with the waffle making.
After a few more minutes, Camael was carrying Anael back into the kitchen. She kissed Lucifer gently as she passed him.
Lucifer smiled at her. "Breakfast is almost ready."
"Good. I'm starving." She bounced the baby slightly. "What is on the agenda today?"
"Well, Lucy really wants to go to the park today."
"I think we can manage that."
"And, because I know she's dying to ask, yes, we can go to get ice cream too."
"YAY!"
Camael laughed at her daughter's reaction. "You love ice cream, don't you, my dear?"
Lucy nodded vigerously.
Camael laughed again, pulling her daughter into a one armed hug. "I love you, you little imp."
"I'm not an imp. Papa said that I was an angel."
"And you are...when you're not being an imp."
"Sit down and I'm sure Papa has some breakfast for you."
"Okay." Lucy obediently climbed up into her chair, tucking her legs under her and sitting up on her knees. Lucifer smiled and set a plate in front of his daughter.
Once they were done eating, Cam sent Lucy to go take a bath. "How on earth does she get so messy?"
"She's a kid. She's supposed to get messy," Lucifer replied with a smile as he started to clean up.
"I'm aware of that. I'm just amazed at how quickly it happens with her." She took the sleepy baby to lay her down in her crib.
Lucifer laughed at that.
She comes back and slides her arms around him. "So..."
He smiled and slid hi arms around her waist. "So indeed."
"Ready for another kid free night anytime soon?"
"With you? I'm ALWAYS eager for a kid free night." He leaned down and nuzzled his face against her neck, tickling her slightly.
She laughed. "Good." She kissed him gently. "Mom will be over at four to pick up the girls."
"You crafty little vixen. I think I'm rubbing off on you."
"I would think it was more accurate to say you've been rubbing off IN me, but that's beside the point." She grins. "I like my alone time with you. I missed out on far too much."
"Same here." He pulled her a little closer, resting her cheek on top of her head.
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